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Embracing the mess

bible journaling encouragement hand lettering life watercolors

This morning I got out my watercolors and paper and pulled up today's verse for the 30 days of Bible lettering challenge,  Isaiah 43:2. All I knew was I wanted it to have a water look to it. I covered the page in water and just started. I thought hmm.. a wave here, and here, nope, that just looks like a blob, whatever just keep going, but I really don't think I'm going to like this.

Then I just stopped thinking and let my fingers go. This is what happened... and I love it. And I just might frame it.

It was a pure mistake and I had no idea it would turn out like this in the end. But it reminds me of life in so many ways. I wake up, have a plan in mind then life heads in another direction. Do I go to bed that night disappointed at the way it went, or do I sit back and look for the joy in the day, the joy of where life lead me that day, the things that I got to see, hear, experience, that maybe I wouldn't have if my day had gone exactly as I had planned it. Sometimes we need to just sit back and let life happen.

I guess my life has been like this for a long time now though. I wanted to be a doctor, I ended up being a teen Mom. I thought having my own business would be easy, nope, wrong there too. I wanted to be a stay at home Mom and bake all day, but I had to go back to work. Having kids is really really hard, especially a teenager when neither of you have a clue what you're doing. I finally get married and think life is going to settle down, 3 months later find out I have cancer. But at the end of the day, when I squint my eyes, take a deep breath and look around, my life is pretty darn amazing. I have a husband who loves me and kids who adore me, a business that has been going for 10 years, I get to work with my Dad in his store, I get to create art, I have family that love me deeply. I am very lucky. We struggle just like everyone else, but we always make it in the end. And we are much stronger because of it. Maybe this is that testing of my faith that Peter was talking about in the Bible.

Does this happen to you too? Sometimes I feel like I am stuck in the waves of this painting, crashing over me, about to suck me under. I get my head above water just to have it crash down on me again. Nothing to grab on to, nothing to secure me and lead me to safety. As soon as I'm treading water and things are going good.. crash.. back under. But, I am strong, I am steadfast, I will not waiver, I will not be torn down. Life has thrown it's punches and I continue to stand up tall. Just as Isaiah 43:2 states in the verse today, the rivers will not sweep over me, in the fire I will not be burned. My faith is so much stronger than that.

I guess there was no real solid point to this post, other than to reach out my arms, give you a tight hug and let you know that if you are feeling like this, or have, or will in the future, I am here for you and I know how it feels and we'll get through this life together. Those waves are going to crash down on us again, no it's not just you, no it's not just me, it happens to all of us, but I'm here and I understand. In the end, I'll bet we'll look back and see just how amazing and beautiful our lives really were.


PS, here are some other watercolors that I have done in the past few days.. just for viewing pleasure. I hope they make you smile. And no, not every post will be some deep encouraging message like this, I promise ;)

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